Ever found yourself tangled in a ridiculous conversation with a big company’s customer service? If you’re anywhere between 45 and 65, this one’s going to hit home — and make you laugh in disbelief.

A few months ago, my aunt sadly passed away in January. Naturally, everyone was dealing with grief, paperwork, and trying to wrap up her affairs. Then, in February, I saw something truly bizarre — CitiBank had charged her credit card a monthly service fee. The kicker? The card had no balance at the time of her passing. But now, somehow, she owed them nearly $60. They’d even slapped on late fees and interest. For a deceased person!

So, I did what any rational family member would do: I called CitiBank.

Me: “Hi, I’m calling because my aunt passed away in January.”
Customer Service Rep: “I’m sorry to hear that. But since the account wasn’t officially closed, the fees still apply.”
Me: “So… you’re charging a dead woman late fees?”
Rep: “Well, since it’s been over 30 days, the account’s already in collections.”

Oh good — so we’ve skipped right over logic and gone straight to nonsense.

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Me: “What exactly do you think the collections team is going to do when they realize she’s no longer… available to pay?”
Rep: “They’ll likely escalate it to our fraud department or report her to the credit bureau.”
Me: “You think God is gonna be mad she didn’t pay her balance off before she passed?”
Rep: “…Excuse me?”
Me: “Did you miss the part where I said she’s dead?”
Rep: “Sir, I’m going to have to transfer you to a supervisor.”

Great. Maybe someone with a little more compassion?

Supervisor: “Hello, I understand you’re calling about your aunt’s account.”
Me: “Yes, she passed away in January, but your company is still billing her.”
Supervisor: “I’m sorry for your loss. However, because the account remained open, the charges are valid.”
Me: “So now you’re expecting to collect money from her estate?”
Supervisor: “Are you her attorney?”
Me: “Nope, just her great-nephew. But I can get you her lawyer’s info if that helps.”

At this point, they asked me to fax a copy of the death certificate. I sent it over right away.

A few hours later, they called me back.

Supervisor: “So, we’ve received the documentation… but our system isn’t really set up for this kind of situation.”
Me: “Meaning?”
Supervisor: “Well, I’m not sure what else we can do…”
Me: “Alright then. If you folks decide to keep sending her statements, be my guest. But I can pretty much guarantee she won’t be responding.”
Supervisor: “Late fees will continue to accumulate.”
Me: “Okay. Would you like her new address?”
Supervisor: “Yes, that might help.”
Me: “Odessa Memorial Cemetery, plot number ####, off Highway 129.”
Supervisor: “That’s… a cemetery.”
Me: “Yes. Where do you send mail to dead people?!”

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While the entire exchange was absurd at the time, looking back, it’s almost cartoonish how disconnected these systems are from reality. We’re talking about a billion-dollar institution that didn’t know how to stop charging a deceased woman for a card she never used again.

The moral? When dealing with corporate bureaucracy, patience is key — but humor is your secret weapon. Because sometimes, all you can do is laugh… even when you’re being asked to settle debts from beyond the grave.

And if you’re ever in this boat yourself? Stay calm, stay firm, and if all else fails, offer them a plot number.