During a classroom discussion on daily habits, the teacher decided to ask a few students about what their dads usually do first thing in the morning.

He turned to Johnny and asked,
“Johnny, what’s the very first thing your father does after waking up?”
Without hesitation, Johnny replied,
“He goes to the toilet, sir.”
Surprised, the teacher followed up,
“Ah… and what does your father do for work?”
“He lays bricks, sir. He’s a bricklayer.”

Video: Teacher “Johnny” asked, “What’s the first thing your father does in the morning?” “He takes the dice

The teacher thought to himself, Well, that tracks…

Next up was Bobby.
“Bobby, how about your dad? What’s his first activity of the day?”
Bobby answered,
“He takes a shit, sir.”
Trying not to raise an eyebrow, the teacher asked,
“And what’s his job?”
“He’s a carpenter, sir.”

Now the teacher was starting to feel that maybe this was a pattern — perhaps a reflection of their upbringing.

Video: The Best Little Johnny Joke Ever Told

Determined to see if this trend continued, he looked at Freddy.
“Freddy, what does your father do for a living?”
“He’s a solicitor, sir.”
“And what’s the first thing he does when he wakes up?”
Freddy proudly replied,
“He reads the newspaper, sir. The Times.”
Now feeling validated in his assumptions, the teacher asked,
“Very cultured! And how long does he spend reading?”
Freddy casually responded,
“Just until he’s finished taking a shit.”